Comfort #39 Comfort of maintaining one’s boundaries

Even though we may not have had the option of maintaining our boundaries as children, we can grow into this power as adults.

I often felt hemmed in by group activities long before I discovered my empathic tendencies.

I did know I could walk away and remove myself from activities that were not part of my high standards, even in high school.

During the course of a fun get-together, I have learned to tell my adult friends that I have  enjoyed the conversation, but that I need to get to a quieter place.

This is completely accepted.

I have learned to ask for help when I need it, even though it is hard for me to do.

I know that the work I do is needed, and I make sure that I am doing it.

I resist the distractions which can so easily present themselves.

During my professional life as a symphony musician, I had a persistent stalker who was also a symphony member.

I felt intimidated when he would try to put his arm around me during rehearsal breaks.

I could tell he was saying derogatory things about me in a different language as they joked and laughed.

I even turned down jobs when I needed the money if I knew he was going to be there.

Finally, I decided that I had had enough.

During the next concert at intermission, as I passed the other musician on the backstage stairs, he backed off.

He saw something in my eyes as I determined not to be victimized any more.

Later, I opened a conversation with him about coming to the US and I found out that he had come here with his wife.

I met her after a concert and the whole situation changed.

I changed my circumstances when I realized I could stand up to maintain my boundaries.

I have been able to draw on this power in other situations when necessary.

I am comforted by the fact that I was able to learn this skill when I did.

I no longer attract bullies.

This was a problem since I was a little girl, but no more.

© 2024 Kathryn Hardage

http://www.shareinspirationandpeace.com